Forgot to tell you something. I am now officially broke, and I need to work. I have tried all the libraries I can think of, but no one needs anyone. This has led me to say yes to a job I really didn’t want to take. This summer I’ll be working as a receptionist. Please kill me NOW!
Yes, it does bother me. It depresses me deep into my bones and my marrow. Is this what I have been reduced to? All those years of studying, getting a degree in literature, speaking four languages – is that what I am? A receptionist?
But I do need the money. And the sites are quite interesting. One is at the offices of a TV-channel.
I was speaking to my mother just now, and she said “..but if you don’t have any choice…” I suppose I do have a choice. I can continue being a bohemian writer/musician (which I only am in my own head right now) with no money, only growing debt, or I can get over myself, and think of all the artists out there who are doing boring jobs just to be able to work on their art.
Something has to change anyway. I’m not doing anything (exept painting dors and stuff), and I don’t have any money either.
Maybe I’ll think differently about it in a week. Right now I just want to be depressed and think about how low I’ve sunk. And to cmnfort myself I will eat potato chips, try to ignore my PMS, watch Game of Thrones and forget for a couple of hours that…… I was going to say that my life sucks, but it doesn’t really. I’m just a bit humiliated, and when did that ever kill anyone?